Posts Tagged friendship

168 Ways To Communicate Better Now Plus Two – 81 – 82 – 83

81. Let go of bitterness.

Bitterness will ruin your life.

Bitterness is contagious.

Bitterness won’t solve the problem.

Bitterness will hold you hostage. 

 82. Lighten up.

Life is not that serious.

No one else cares.

You ’11 live longer and be healthier.

Relax and enjoy.

 83.   Listen.

You will gain insight.

You will gain knowledge.

You will make friends.

You will be remembered.

You will be unique.

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Thankful Thursday – Sally Cook Christian

            On this Thankful Thursday I am thankful for Sally Christian. Unfortunately Sally moved to Columbia several years ago with husband, James, who was perusing graduate work at USC. Sally was a member of the Sunday school class I led at First Baptist Church of Charleston and of the Charleston Optimist Club. She worked for an insurance company but is much better known for her generous hugs. The daughter of a Boy Scout executive, she was born in Dothan, Alabama and moved to Greer, SC when she was three. She graduated from Hartsville, SC High School and went to Winthrop for a year. She moved to Charleston and then to Houston. Good sense took over and she moved back to Charleston. Several years ago I was invited to her home in the middle of the summer for a Thanksgiving feast. Sally and James had friends visiting from Australia who had never experienced an American Thanksgiving. Now they have. What a great idea. Everyone loved it. A few years back, Sally started giving me, Annual Guideposts, which is a devotional book, as a Christmas present. Thankfully she still does and I start every day with its great messages. Sally is a positive, cheerful, gracious ray of sunshine to everyone who knows her.  She is still missed very much in Charleston. On this Thankful Thursday, I am thankful for my friend, Sally Christian.

            Thankful Thursday is a day set apart to recognize someone who is important in our lives. Let her or him know of your gratitude. Develop an attitude of gratitude. Say Something Nice; Be a Lifter. You will be glad that you did.

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52 Keys for Living, Loving and Working

            What are the keys that unlock the door to a fuller, richer, happier, more fulfilling life? What are those ingredients that foster mental, physical and spiritual well being? These questions are as old as time. No one has all of the answers, but centuries of human struggles and triumphs have revealed the ones that seem to be most effective when cultivated and exercised over a long period of time. There may be others that work well for you.  Add them to the ones presented here. All of humanity constantly strives to uncover the secrets that lead to a sense of well being and fulfillment. Although we all strive for happiness, the wisdom of the ages argues that happiness seems to be a byproduct of how we live our lives rather than a strategy to be mastered. The direction of all life is toward growth. Each experience, each encounter, each revelation prepares us for the next.  Each new insight opens even more vistas to us. Life continues to unfold before us if we are open to receive the lessons and if we are willing to push our boundaries beyond what we already know and what feels safe. The abundant life we crave does not reside in safety. Unless we are willing to step out in unknown territory and make ourselves vulnerable to pain and uncertainty our lives will remain unfulfilled and dim shadows of what could be. Life is meant to be an adventure into discovering who we are and our relationship to one another. Life is made up of a series of ever changing, ever evolving relationships that touch and create other relationships.

The Centrality of Faith

Faith is the foundation of all relationships, with God, with our self, and with others. We establish and develop relationships through faith. We decide whether or not we want to establish or maintain a relationship based on a mutual understanding that states, I believe that this will be good for each of us. We also decide whether or not to enter into a faith relationship with God and at what level. According to the Holy Bible only a minute measure of faith is required – our faith only needs to be as great as a mustard seed which is the smallest seed known. “Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” We must also have some measure of faith toward ourselves. This requires that we know who we are and what we are about – not an easy task. Establishing relationships demonstrates a basic faith that there is a tomorrow – a reason to live, love and hope.

The Keys

Be present                  

            Be present is by far the most important key. Be in the moment with your whole being not thinking of what will come next or what has happened in the past. Be in this moment fully committed to it. We need to glean from each moment what it has to reveal to us. This is the now. What is happening this very instant? We cannot detain the moment, or recall it, but we can easily miss it.

            When we are at work, we spend much of our time thinking about what we would like to be doing at home. Sometimes we are planning our vacation, thinking about our daughter’s impending wedding, thinking about our grandchildren or perhaps retirement. Our mind has temporarily taken flight. We are not present with the current project or with the other people in the room. We miss what is taking place in the moment.

            When we are at home, we think about what awaits at work again missing the now. We miss the smiles, sparkling eyes, sighs, stiffened body language and the lilt in the voice. We are focused on another place and time.

            Liza Minnelli, the fabulous Oscar, Emmy, Tony, and Grammy winner, has it right when she says, “If you’ve got one foot in yesterday and one foot in tomorrow, you’re missing today.”[1]


[1] Liz Smith. Parade Magazine. March 01, 2009

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