Posts Tagged disagree

The Side of Kindness: Recovering the Lost Art of Being Kind by Sandra Makowski, SSMN.

Sandra Makowski explores the deplorable state of kindness in modern society and offers simple suggestions to recapture a kinder gentler more affirming culture. “Why can’t disagreements be viewed as healthy and acceptable as long as they are reasonable and realistic?”  She uses her personal experiences to illustrate much that has gone wrong. Each chapter contains activities to help us on our journey.

After much internal conflict,  I decided that chapter 29, “Don’t Just Do Something, Stand There,” is the most significant one for me; however, I had previously decided that chapter 24, “Not Counting Women and Children – Where’s the Kindness in That?,”  is the most powerful. It certainly is one of the most provocative. She compares the historical bad treatment that women have received from the church to spousal abuse. As you read each chapter, I predict that you will experience similar struggles in deciding which chapter is the most relevant to you. Each chapter challenges our basic assumptions about ourselves, other people and God.

Sister Sandra has written a deceptively simple book; however, it tugs at every motive and action of our daily lives. She challenges us to live as if we really believe the teachings of Jesus. Each chapter begins with well chosen quotations. The book is available at

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168 Ways To Communicate Better Now Plus Two 64 – 65 – 66

64. Disagree without becoming disagreeable.

Smile while disagreeing.

Don’t allow disagreements to become personal.

Look for areas of agreement.

Focus on the problem.

Don’t deal in personality.

Control your body language 

65. Downplay differences.

 Minimize them instead.

 We are more alike than we are different.

Search for even small areas of agreement.

Diversity fosters creativity.

Listen more than you talk. 

 66.  Empower others.

 Value their ideas.

 Delegate responsibilities.

 Delegate authority.

Give others meaningful assignments.

Give others credit.


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